I Told My Daughter People Won’t Like Her

I wish someone had done the same to me.

Photo by Simon Rae on Unsplash

Last year my twelve-year-old made me this request:

Don’t be the mom who wants to be cool and don’t be the mom who tries to be cool. Just be the mom who is naturally cool.

When my daughter said this, I understood what she meant. I should be likable so her friends don’t think I’m annoying or mean. I shouldn’t dress too trendy, but also not like a 60-year old. Above all, I shouldn’t embarrass her in front of her friends or ask them too many questions!

She’s at an age where the opinions of her friends are becoming more and more important. I get it. I remember what it was like.

What I’m more interested in is teaching her how to be true to herself.

Growing up, I thought that doing what I was supposed to do and doing my best meant that I would be liked.

As if!

Yes, I still quote movies from the 90s. I know. It’s not cool.

I spent years thinking that if someone didn’t like me, then I must be doing something wrong. I still remember the moment I overheard a classmate in high school say, “I…