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How to Actually Change Your Partner (And Why You Should)
Hint: it’s not by criticizing them
“Don’t try to change your spouse” is terrible advice.
I know it’s meant to be helpful. The intention is that we shouldn’t dictate our beliefs or views on our partner. We shouldn’t try to make them into someone they aren’t. We should accept them as they are.
“You’re not going to change me.”
“Don’t try to change him.”
“I’m not changing for anyone.”
“This is me, take it or leave it.”
You’ve likely heard or been told one of these cliched expressions — or at least watched characters in 80s movies say them.
We’ve also been told that people don’t like change. (We can debate that another time.)
But all of life is about change. It’s nothing but that.
If we don’t help and support one another in changing, then what’s the point in being together?
And wouldn’t it get boring after a while?
“A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.” — Muhammad Ali
This bad movie advice to not change or be changed might be appropriate for a casual relationship in…
